Monday, March 2, 2015

Life in 2015

Man these days sure do fly! I hate when I wait so long to write. Life is so different from when I last posted. The kids have gotten so big and are so old:) Our weeks seriously go by so fast but I feel like we just keep doin the same thing. Jake is still a graphic designer for Ariix and he loves what he does. We thought he would have to look for a different job the last couple months but things have really smoothed out at Ariix and things are better for the time being. We dont know if he'll be there forever but we just take it day by day and he at least loves the people he works with. Its a great atmosphere so thats great! I have gotten to know alot of people from his worth and do some of their hair and its been so fun to get to know the people that your husband interacts with every day:) Jake is 2nd counseler in the Elders Quorum and isnt super busy with that so thats good.. or is it?? He loves to keep up with politics and whats goin on on the other side of the world and keeps me updated on all the crazy things that are happening and that will happen. He's been reading this book called " Yearning for the Living God" and its about this guy who lives here in Bountiful. Its been really eye opening to him and its given him a kick in his pants to make sure we as a family are doin what we need to be doin and is better about scripture study and saying family prayer. He is such a fun dad and loving husband and we are so lucky to have him.

Paisley is now 4 and goes to preschool at Boulton Elementary 2 days a week. She loves goin to preschool and its been the best thing for her. Shes learned so much this past year and its really been a blessing. I was really starting to worry and get stressed because she was so far behind in her speech. She sees a speech therapist once a week at school and she is a completely different girl. At the end of the school year she needs to be at least 50% better then when she started but just in December they game me a paper of all her statistics of where shes at and where shes come and shes already 70% better then when she started and I cried tears of joy when I read that. I always felt it was my fault that she was far behind because when she was a little girl she hated to read and I didn't push her and hold her tight and make her read with me. Who knows if thats why shes behind but Ive just compared her and briggs and he's talked alot better then her way early on... at one point I even thought Briggs talked more and better then her.  She is a tough one to deal one but definetly has her sweet and sincere side. We butt heads alot and thats probably how it always will be until she moves out of the house. Shes really stubborn and stomps her feet at me when she doesn't get her way and tells me to go away alot of the time, but on her sweet side she has always been so caring of others peoples feelings. Whenever I cry or Briggs or someone gets hurt she says "its ok mom" and will wipe my tears or give briggs hugs but is just really loving. She not shy at all and will talk to anyone. Alot of people still ask me what shes saying so I still have to play translator but its getting better. She has been in such a creative mood lately. She loves to craft and color, paint, cut paper and anything in that area. For Christmas her Aunt Jennie gave her this bucket full of fun creative things to do. Whether its stringing fruit loops on a string, or gluing cotton balls on paper to make a sheep, or tracing the letters, she has loved it! Its been the best gift she  ( and I ) have ever recieved. She still has a love for the tv and could watch it ALL DAY LONG if I let her. Somedays when I do hair she knows she gets to watch it but Ive been trying to better as shes gotten older to understand that she needs to go play with her toys or just run around the house and with her bringing on this creative side luckily she could do that for hours. She says the cutest things lately and I'm goin to be better about posting them so I can look back in 10 years and remember because in my head I cant remember what funny things she said yesterday so this will be good getting back into the swing of journaling our lives. She has a best friend named Kamry Gardner and luckily Jake and i and her parents have become pretty great friends which makes it nice. Alot of the time they play almost every day. They love to get dressed about 13 times while they play with each other. Its so cute to see there imaginations come out! Pais is in CTR 4 right now and has the best teachers ever. Most of the time she wants to come sit by my in the back of the room and falls alseep alot but I try to take her back up there and listen to whats being taught and sung. Shes starting to memorize the primary songs and so fun to see that what is being taught is sticking her her head and shes remembering. 2 nights ago she had her first dance recital and it was such a great night. Allen and Diane (jakes parents) and my parents, camille & avery, sierra and scotty all came. I was nervous when it was her time to go on cause I thought it would be my luck thatour families travel all this way and watch her just stand up there with a pout and her arms folded. She freakin owned that stage and we were all dying of laughter! All of the cute little dancers had it memorized and they didn't need any help. It was the best dance of the show! Diane was even crying afterwards just cause I dont think shes even seen pais shine that way before. It was so darling! After the whole recital we went up there to get her and some of the other dancers moms brought flowers which i was feeling horrible that I hadnt even thought of it and we went up to Pais and congratulated her and she looked at us with this straight face and said "wheres my flowers" it was hilarious. Luckily one of my friends Kristy Hodgkindson had extras and she let me have some to give to Pais. She slept with them that night! She is starting to add more things to her eating list which is nice but still doesn't eat a whole lot. I love to see what outfits she puts together and is all about "matching". My favorite is when she puts on her swimsuit and her snow boots, life jacket, and beanie and coat. Especially when its 20 degrees outside. She still loves her blanky and her sippy will be the death of me!


 Briggs, he is 2 1/2 goin on 15. He is in such the cutest stage ever! He is very destructive and wants to throw everything with much power. For instance, our neighbors  (the browns) dog had puppies and we went to go play with them and briggs took one right over to there ledge in the backyard and looked like he was about to drop it off the ledge. He is so funny but you have to watch him. He loves tractors, dump trucks, backhoes, loaders, fire trucks, garbage trucks, trains and any heavy machinery. He is ALL.BOY! Its been so fun to have one of each! He does this little squint lately with his whole face.. mostly when hes concentrating, watching tv...... i die of laughter everytime! Last night he farted and we looked at him and he just gave us the biggest cheasiest grin! He has the cutest smile and can get me to change my mind in a jiffy! He loves to take things from his sister and run for his life! He loves to be chased and tickeld and thrown against the cuddle bag or couch or thrown on a bed. He falls off the couch all the time and we hold our breath for a sec wandering if hell get up screaming or laughing and most the time its laughing so he can take a beating! He eats SO MUCH! He seriously already eats like a teenager which is nice because pais dones't eat anything! Its amazing the things that he eats and he will pretty much eat anything we give him. I love the time I get with him while Pais is at school. Hes so fun to play with and he loves me to read to him. He is verry good at talking and you can understand almost everything he says. Whenever you ask him a questions his reply is always "uh-huh" and its the cutest thing ever. Both the kids are very good with there manners and i'm so proud cause manners are a huge deal for me! I cant wait to get him in some sports cause he will tear up the feild or court. He looks 100% his dad but acts alot like me which alot of people say Pais is lookin just like me but acts more like her dad. Briggs loves being outside and could play in the sandbox any time and any weather. Hes still working on sharing his toys and get upset most of the time but sometimes he'll shock us and be so willing to give up his toys. Alot of the time he walks around with all his toys in hand and holds on for dear life so that no one can take them from him. I think thats the pack rat in him coming out. For the most part Pais and briggs play pretty good together. There good buds and dont really get bother by each other. Only if briggs is stepping all over pais or teasing her. Briggs is in nursery and does really good. Goes in like a champ everytime!


As for me.. ahhh where to begin. Motherhood is hard. It is such a whirlwind and your always wandering if your doin what your suppose to and its so hard reading things of what to do and what not to do cause you don't want your child to turn out a certain way or if they are like this then its because of this but alot of times I just try to listen to my motherly instincts and do whats best for me and my kids. Now that there older it is easier but sometimes i feel like there only getting harder. Now that they know how to talk back and have an opinion. I totally feeling the "should we have another one yet?" I totally want one but most days I wander how i'll be able to do it all. One thing Ive learned about myself is that I am not a nice person when I am stressed. I always thought that I would be the nicest, funnest mom and so patient. WRONG! I have learned so much about myself and have learned what works best and somethings I'm still trying to figure out about myself. This year Ive finaly been good about goin to the gym and taking care of myself that way and the kids love goin to the daycare there. I go with my friend leigh and it makes a huge difference having someone to go with! I feel like most days all I do is clean but somedays I just say screw it and we all sit on the couch and watch a movie! I need to be better at playing games with them but we sure do love and have dance parties bout once a day. Once of my favorite times of days is right when the kids wake up and we hug like we haven't seen each other in a long time. The other is when we put them to bed. We lay with them and read stories and sing songs and we just talk to them and its so fun! I will miss these days! I get told all the time that before I know it they will be moving out. I'm definetly not ready for that but I am getting better about enjoying the journey and not being so stressed all the time! Life is so wonderful! I love that Ive been able to help my grandma dot so much. I love her with all my heart and my kids love her too.  I hope that they will remember her when she goes:( I know that time is coming close and its a day we all dread but she is miserable. She wants to die and it makes us so sad cause she says things like I have nothing to live for anymore and she just hurts and complains all the time. Sometimes are hard to not talk back to her and tell her to quit complaining about everything but we know we just have to suck it up so we don't regret anything:) I love being in the primary presidency and the women I get  to serve with. They have been so good to me this year and letting me vent to them. Once thing that Ive learned living up here is that people and there values are different and thats been hard for me. Its been eye opening and a game changer for me and makes me take a step back and make sure Im being my true self! I have 2 best friends that i get to see alot named Emily Clark and Ashley Musgrove. I love these women and they have so many good things to say. I feel like were all on the same wave length and i feel comfortable telling them personal things and they have helped me get through them. I hope we can stay friends forever! I love our house and the area that we live. We have great neighbors and an amazing ward! I cant picture us anywhere else at this point in our lives. Somedays I wander if i need to go see a therapist and just talk about the past and my moms death. I think me and my brothers are still scarred from it and need to talk about it and get help. Not sure what to do but I am about to put together this book of my mom and i cant wait to see it all come together! Thats all for now:)

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FaMiLiEs ArE FoReVeR*

..."I believe in the family where there
is a husband who regards his
companion as his greatest asset and
treats her accordingly;
where there is a wife who looks upon
her husband as her anchor and strength.
The cultivation of such a home
requires effort and energy,
forgiveness and patience,
Love,
and, endurance, and sacrifice;
but it is worth all of these and more."....

.. Gordan B. Hinckley